Friday, June 26, 2009


I'm doing a water fast today. I don't know if it's the cleansing of emotions or PMS or what but I cannot get a grip.

I miss my home. I miss my real friends. I miss my family. I miss living in a clean environment (one where I am not the only person who occasionally cleans). I miss having fun. I'm sick of the situation I'm in and I'm sick of feeling like I'm always waiting for life to hit me instead of going out and living it. And I'm not sure what I need to do to fix that--I can't really purge myself of the people who drive me crazy since I live with them, and I can't move back home to where I'm actually happy because I have obligations here. It's so frustrating.

So I'm sorry this post is a downer but I just had to vent. I wanted to talk to my Mom but her phone is turned off (sometimes she forgets to have it on during the day).

And maybe it's the stress from all of this that's making it so hard for me to make healthy decisions. I keep straying toward the junk-foody options instead of fresh fruit and veggies and I cannot find the motivation to go work out.

Ahhh I just don't know what to do.

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